Saturday, May 10, 2008
& goodbye doesn't mean forever
so yesterday was sort of like a potpourri of whirling emotions again? Guess so.
Had quite an entertaining time during dazu today. *ahem* entertaining in a boring fashion. Since they were doing molou the entire time, we suona people were all boring ourselves to death at the prospect of waiting for another 150+ bars before we could actually play a single note. And when we actually got to our part, we totally skrewed it up because we had absolutely no idea when to come in. Probably even schubert wouldn't know when to come in if he were playing, how can anyone know when to come in if you have a score that's totally SPARTAN, save the title and a number of empty bars and performance directions, right up to the part where you start playing.
So dingding and us had to ask the other sections and look at the zong pu to try and find a little indication for our parts.
Songs with little suona parts suck.
Looks like we're doing tajike for encore, whoopeedoo!
and um, on to the sad part of the day.
Sometimes we get so attached to people, we literally latch ourselves to them and live on our relationships with other people. And when you're forced to part your ways, or leave each other for good, life just whacks you on the head and you realise that it is your craving for acceptance, your hunger for eternal friendship, your love for being able to be with people... it just makes you so vulnerable... so terrified... of simply the thought of being away from them, not being able to see them for months, years, a lifetime, maybe even eternity.
And that is what makes me a person, I guess.
my maid james left last night. So james seems the most unlikely name, but forget it, that's the only name I'll ever, ever want to remember her for the rest of my life. It's so sad to think that someone who's been around for years, listening to you ramble about such and such, or helping you remember things you might've misplaced around the house, watching late-night horror shows with you at night, laughing at ____, wrestling and just being such a nice daily companion... is finally leaving.
i heart you, james, for being the one person at home whose age group is closest enough to me to be a real companion, and someone who understands stuff that sometimes parents just can't, or won't. Thankyou for wholeheartedly listening to my stories and sometimes draggy recounts of dreams till the end instead of cutting in to worry about electricity bills or why the char kway teow isn't fried well enough, for not grumbling about how "the music young punks listen to now are so noisy", for allowing me to scream when I get very excited, and really, above all, just for your company. You're more than just a maid, you're a real mate. :)
Everyone's so sad that you have to go, and maybe once you've settled your fuzzy problem back home you could come back and work with us again, you said you really want to do that next time. Whatever the case, I'll be waiting for you on your old bed with the radio (that has the worst reception on earth), the pink unicorn you won at Escape and your smelly orange blanket. :)
Why am I posting your farewell message here when there's barely any cybercafes in your village?
Don't say you're sorry, because it's not really your fault that you have to go.
Because goodbye doesn't have to mean forever.
:' )
Octeopus rambled on and on and on, on
3:53 PM.
